Friday, May 28, 2010

An update, some thanks, and the disappointment of family

Greetings, sports fans. Full plate today, so let's get right to it.

As regards my incipient life of a grinder, things are moving at more or less the exact pace that I thought they'd be moving at. I'm winning my DoN tables at about a 90% clip; I'm building my bankroll at the exact pace I wanted to. I am about halfway to where I need to be to start playing the $100 tables regularly. My bankroll has some real money in it now; it's a struggle to keep it in my playing account and not do something exotic with it, like pay my bills. But I have a plan, I am executing to that plan, and there's no reason to sabotage that plan because the cable bill came today.

This Double of Nothing deal, it's not for the action junkies, I'll tell you that. It is, let's call it by its real name, boring as hell. But I'm not in this to press the adrenaline button. I'm in this to be a jizzle-oh-bizzle, a J-O-B. In the 47 minutes I spent playing poker today, I made roughly what someone earning minimum wage would make having worked all day. I have to satiate myself with statistics like that to convince myself that playing these games is worth it, because it is, really, so very boring.

I'm considering raising my daily quota, to get to my bankroll number sooner than I otherwise would, so I can start playing for real money. I think $60 a day is a nicer number than $40, so I think I'll upgrade to there.

I've started playing two tables at a time. I think this is a good approach; if I lose a game in reality I only lose a few bucks in vig. If I win both, that's great. And I can't imagine losing both games at once, so rarely do I not come in the top half. So I'll try to integrate that into my comfort zone.

I'll also put out there some long-term thinking: If I start making my ultimate goal number, $200 a day, with regularity, I might start shooting for $300 a day. It would mean a longer work day but it would also mean a $75,000 income per year, which in turn would mean I could pull a nice sum out per week for the bills and still build the ol' bankroll, buy Christmas presents, pay for prostitutes, whatever. Wait, what?

So that's that. The summation of the summation: Things are going exactly to plan, with the future looking even brighter.

I wanted to thank the Duckster as well for the shout out. Duck, I appreciate the tip o' the bill, but I will cop to a little ambivalence to the popularization of the DoN tourneys that Pokerstars has. Not like either Duck or I have the ability to sway an appreciable amount of business towards or away from the DoN's, but bringing in more players would assure the long-term viability of the game type but might also bring in good players. The only thing that might prevent that is that most poker players are action junkies. Sure, the really successful ones are super-genius action junkies, but action junkies they remain. So just remember this, fellas: It's boring. You really good players should stay away. And to the below-average players: I hear they serve cake. You should check it out. The $50 tables, anyone who finishes in the bottom five gets a big piece of cake. Just click "Lobby" and wait for the cake. Really.

Lastly, I have a piece of advice for any of you who are planning to engage in cards as a means of making a living: Don't tell your family. They, instead of being the most supportive people in your life, will not be. In fact they will prove to be the least supportive, and do so in ways which will not fail to disappoint you, to hurt you, and to convey their utter lack of faith in your ability to earn your bread and board by playing cards. I would instead suggest starting up a blog, making some friends out there, and spilling your guts to them. Ruminating on the irony of people you don't know supporting you and people who have known you since birth (some of whom who were indeed directly involved in said birthing) showing you no faith at all is of course optional.

Thanks, friends.


  1. Exactly Gary. Do not tell people you play poker for a iving unless of course you win a major tournament then all of a sudden its cool. Good luck and keep it up (poker that is)

  2. @Coop, yeah, thanks man. Good advice but it's still kind of a drag to see them respond the way they do.

  3. Actually there is another set of sites that run the DoN tourneys besides Stars. The Cake network has them though they call them Double Ups. They run a faster level tho.

  4. G-man is right. Very boring. If you're a good player you'll HATE it.

    However, if you've never played poker before, it's a great training ground. Plus G-Man and I can offer you advice on what hands to play.

    For example, always fold "letter" cards (A,K,Q,J), they are bad. And always draw to that inside straight, you never know when it'll hit!

    Plus, if you lose... free cake!