...for they will have their way, despite your or anyone's best efforts.
Today I spent the day with Josie and Cranky playing poker and laughing my ass off. I hadn't enjoyed myself this much in literally years. My stomach hurts from laughing - my cheeks too. And on top of that I turned $200 into $600 in seven hours, which is actually about what I made in a day at my high-stress phony baloney corporate joyboy job that almost gave me an ulcer before I finally quit. I drove Josie home and we spent yet another couple of hours laughing and recapping the evening's high and low points. I drove home happy, tired, and with deep pockets.
And when I got home, I went downstairs to find that Pearl was lying in the exact same spot she was in when I left her, her breathing labored and shallow. I picked her up and her head lolled back - she was apparently completely paralyzed. Tootsie took her in her arms to comfort her, and whether she was just waiting for me to get home, or the act of picking her up loosed something like a clot, within two minutes she was gone.
The last day of her life, I was off whooping it up at Foxwoods, lollygagging over dinner, and taking a route that was two full hours out of my way, partly because Josie needed a ride but mostly because I really didn't want the day to end. I was having a great time. And Pearl spent the day paralyzed, scared, and hungry, all day and night.
Most of you know that I don't believe in, well, anything, but it's difficult right now to think that the world doesn't somehow punish you if you dare to enjoy life too much.
Maybe I'll feel differently tomorrow. I certainly hope I do. But right now I wish I didn't feel anything.
I'll leave Jo and Cranky to write up the day, if that's ok with you all. It really was fun, but I'm having a tough time remembering that.