Very Josie Guestie Postie

Words fall from Josie's mouth, 'tis said, like flower petals alighting gently on the surface of a pond. As much as I know better, it is still my pleasure to bring those words to you. I will pass along every message, no matter how off-topic, off-color, or off-its-rocker. Please to enjoy. 

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Hello All,

I’m in the midst of one of life’s frustrations and since nothing else seems to motivate me, I thought why not the interwebz?

But let me back up and get you up to speed.  Let’s go back to last summer.  I was doing my thang, exercising, eating right and though I’ll never be skinny, I was feeling good and looking hot (what else is new?).  Winter came and so did the pounds.  They started creeping back up, and me?  I avoided the scale.  Until March, that is.  Lo and behold, I’d gained 20 lbs.  Yes TWENTY pounds.  I had to do SOMETHING, but what?

I was looking for something to motivate me, and I thought I’d found the answer.  If you know me at all, you know I am incredibly competitive and I never made a bet  that I didn’t use all my resources to win.  Soooooo…..  I placed a bet at www.healthywage.com They’re motto is “Get paid to lose weight!”

I had to give them entirely too much information about me, like my habits, how I was planning to lose the weight, if I was using a tracking device like a fitbit, or weight watchers, my height, weight, age, etc etc etc.  You give them all this information, then you tell them how many pounds you are betting you will lose.  In my case I am betting that I will lose 25 lbs.  Based on all that, they offered me a couple of bets.  They’re obviously betting I WON’T lose the weight.  The bet I chose is that I would lose $25 lbs by September 9^th.  I am betting $300 that I will do this.  If I actually do it, they will pay me $1,000.  That’s a net of $700 for all you math geniuses out there.  The time frame was 6 months, March to September, which is entirely too long.

So thinking I had plenty of time, I started, then stopped then started again.  Thus far I have lost a whopping 2 lbs and now I’m starting to panic.  I’ve never in my life felt less motivated to lose weight.  WTF?  I have no idea why but the bottom line is, I pay them $50 a month for 6 months and in September they either will or will not send me a check for $1,000.  It’s all up to me.  And you. 

I need your help.  I need accountability, cuz shit, September 9 is TWO FREAKING MONTHS AWAY. 

FAWK. 

It’s like I’ve just awakened from a daze.  But the thing is, I can soooooo do this.  I mean it’s a thousand fucking dollars!

So I’m going to post my weight loss here every week and hopefully that number will hit 25 lbs by September 9^th.  Ugh.

And not for nothing but my hirsute buddy Gary here has lost like 500 lbs which is very inspiring so why cannot I get out of my funk and do this?  One excuse, erm reason,  is the extreme pain from my knees when I do anything that involves bending them.  (insert dirty joke) I have zero cartilage in both knees but I can still do yoga, walk, do the stationary bike, free weights, etc, so it’s no excuse really.  Plus Gary lost all this weight without exercising. At. All.  Fucking men!  He’s on the “I have diabetes” diet and I’m starting to think I may have to follow suit and just pretend I have diabetes.  (Not really – there will be no insulin shootings to be sure)

So there you have it.  Help Very Josie win her weight loss bet –or- Watch as Very Josie loses her bet and goes postal at healthwage.com.  Either way it should be entertaining.  Any tips, thoughts, insight and inspiration would be gladly accepted.

July 10, 2014:  2 lbs lost, 23 to go.

Diet smart.

Josie